Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Checking in

I thought it was about time I put finger to keypad and let you know where I have been, presuming of course there are still people out there following my blog after my long absence, and are still interested. The last few months have not been easy for me – okay, if I’m honest they’ve been awful – seeing me separate from my husband and moving into a new flat with my daughter that I still feel isolated in. Don’t know if I’ll ever settle here but that’s a different story and one I won’t bore you with just now.

According to statistics, separation/divorce and moving house are the top two causes of stress and with the way I have been feeling would wholeheartedly agree with this. I’m not the first woman to separate from their husband and I won’t be the last but it’s a first for me having been with him for 19 years and it hit me harder than I thought possible. Normally my art would be therapeutic to me through times like this but I couldn’t face picking up my pencils and putting them to paper at all – just as well really as I wouldn’t have been able to see through my puffy eyes. It was honestly a case of ‘surely there can’t be any more tears’ and started to wonder where they were all coming from.

I reluctantly decided to take time out from doing commissioned work for the rest of the year as my heart wasn’t in it. The run up to Christmas is always a busy time for me and I couldn’t face any added stress of deadlines etc. and thought the break would give me much needed ‘me time’ to adjust to my new life. I didn’t want to stop drawing altogether – I couldn’t do that – but be able to pick up my pencils when I wanted and for how long I wanted.

Lately, for the first time in weeks, I have been wanting to draw but have nowhere to do it, hence no picture to share with you in this post! I had a room in my old house that I made into a studio which I now miss terribly. Here in the flat I can’t have such luxuries as I simply don’t have the space but I can fit a desk in (when it arrives) which will do for now. It should be with me, flat-packed unfortunately, early next week so will have pics to share with you then. I have a couple of horses I'm looking forward to starting.

In the meantime I will have to make do with looking at what other artists are up to (I follow a ridiculous number of blogs) and admire their artwork instead – always inspires me to get out my pencils, which incidently are still packed away in boxes along with my countless other art materials until I can find the space to put everything.